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The Best Time To Never Send Email

aaahAs usual, I’ve had enough.

Every month a new “study” comes out to say when the best time is to send email out to your list/subscribers/mother.

This study say between 12am-3am http://blogs.constantcontact.com/fresh-insights/best-time-to-send-emails/

This study says 8 a.m. – 10 a.m. and 3 p.m. – 4 p.m http://blog.getresponse.com/best-time-to-send-email-infographic.html

This study says 6am-7am http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-505125_162-57411092/the-best-time-to-send-email-so-it-will-get-read/

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Check Your Facts Before You Shell Out Info

Social media is an amplifier. The little mix-ups and mistakes we all make in life are just part of being human, and usually we do them quietly. But when we fark up online, people are listening. Our mistakes can get a whole lot louder, which is why checking our facts before we share information online is really important. Before you fuss with your spelling and your grammar and before you click Update, Post, or Send, please make sure what you are sharing is valid. Or at the very least include in the comment that you aren’t sure. So when you see on Twitter that Jon Bon Jovi is dead, maybe you will pause and think for a minute before you share.

Currently, people are sharing two things about Shell Oil that are hoaxes/parodies. One is the website that is made to look like a crowd-sourced ad-campaign gone wrong for shell:

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How Delta’s Tweet Saved The Brand Day

One tweet. 140 characters can mean the difference to your brand. Any brand. Even the biggest.

Twitter is a place where we (meaning me) talk about mostly meaningless stuff. What we’re eating, thinking, watching, doing. That’s what I like about it. It’s virtual small talk. However, we also use it to vent. Venting is our way of getting things out, and Twitter allows us as consumers to vent about mistreatment and to have others give us virtual hugs, and if we’re lucky, we publicly shame the company into playing nice.

It’s amazing what one reply can do. Take what happened recently to me:

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Worst Scheduled Tweet Timing. Ever.

Social media runs in real-time. Real-fast real-time. If you want to play in the pool, you better be in the pool for the entire party.

Brands/people etc have looked foolish in the past when they’ve scheduled auto-tweets that get sent at bad times during world events like disasters, elections and otherwise.

However, this one from 30 minutes ago takes the cake.

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The 5 Ways You Stink At LinkedIn

Ah LinkedIn. The Granpappy of “Social Media”.

So much potential, yet so much stink. The fans and fanatics shout about how great it is since it’s only for “business people” and you don’t get all the junk that is on the other social sites. The problem is LinkedIn isn’t even a social media site. It’s a digital Rolodex pretending to be social. As a way to connect with the very people you hated at your last job it’s perfect. I’m actually one of their original members and have more contacts than an octopus with 10,000 biz cards (only to make up for my lack of popularity in high-school) but I go there less and less now.

I actually do see the potential of it, especially for job-seekers and employers looking to hire. If I was still in HR (which I left when I realized I hated people) it would be the perfect recruitment research tool.

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When We Exaggerate Our Size, Everyone Loses

What? It's a squash. Perv.Since the dawn of marketing/communication/PR/advertising we’ve had an issue with “exaggerating” things. We claim our magazine has a circulation of a million, but that includes each magazine being passed around 4 times. We boast that our billboard is seen by the 3 million cars that drive by a week, when the study claims that every person looks at it, and each car counted has 11 passengers inside.

Inflating numbers isn’t new, the problem I have is when we take the same methods and apply them to social media, and for this post specifically Twitter.

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The Problem With A Cheap Pedicure

So there I was, minding my own business (which means creepily reading everyone else’s business on Twitter/Facebook/Google+/Friendster?) and I ran across my main man Chris from Kitestring posting a link to a daily deal for a salon in town:

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How Budweiser Just Won The Superbowl and The Internet

Being knee deep in writing about awesome/unawesome brands for my next book (due out September 2012) I had just submitted my 60,000 word file to my editor of awesome, Shannon Vargo at Wiley.

And then Budweiser Canada farked it all up for me and went and made one of the greatest Superbowl commercials of all-time. I’m already a Bud Light Lime freak and then this happened.

For the 3 people that don’t know, hockey is life in Canada. I don’t even play and it still holds a special place in my heart. You don’t even have to like the sport to love this. When I saw this video today, it connected on a level that most brands try but never ever reach.

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Worst Use Of Social Media of 2012: Boners BBQ

+++UPDATED BELOW+++

Ten days into the new year and I think we already have a champion.

No, it’s not the N-Control Avenger PR Disaster that rounded out 2011. Nor was it the FedEx foul-up.

Let’s say you own a BBQ joint and a customer comes in, one of the only ones and orders a meal. You can tell she’s not happy and it’s verified by a well-written and factual review on Yelp.

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Warm Spam: The Worst Social Media Recipe, Ever.

Delicious warm SpamBack in the old days of the Internet/Email, it was a happy place (we’ll call this time period B.S. “Before Spam”). In the BS years the Internet was pure information and email was a way to communicate useful information and conversation. Every time an email came in, it was like a little butterfly of excitement flew into your computer, knowing it was containing an ingredient of awesome. Then something changed. Email started getting UnAwesome.

Cold-callers, Cold-knockers (those that went door-to-door) and Car-smackers (placing flyers on your windshield) realizing that their methods of sales assault worked less and less, had found a place that they no longer even had to lift a finger to push their useless wares on the public. “Now we can email our crap!” and proceeded to group-high five (which is now evolved to awkward fist-bumping).

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